I do sometimes wish that dating was like it was in Jane Austen books. But that is also because I dated a sociopath (more on that to come). The problem is that real life isn’t like a Jane Austen novel. A woman does not simply hate a man and then love him (unless he is a sociopath). I have come to believe that instinct is really important. If your instinct tells you something is wrong, you should listen to it. I should know. The sociopath triggered my instincts many times. And I found out almost a year later that I was right. He was cheating on me. The night he told me he was spending at his grandmother’s because his parents’ thought they left the door open? Yes, he was with her. Sickening. But I should have trusted my instincts and driven over there. I even had a dream that night that he was cheating on me. I would have been close to healed by now. Instead, I am beginning this journey.
I teach high school, and the Transcendentalists believe that our instinct is our link to God. I believe in that now. I will trust that now. I will never let anyone make me feel foolish (as he did) of my suspicions.
I welcome you on my journey. The journey of healing after having gotten out of a bad relationship. So I am going to read Jane Austen books again and learn what they have to teach about dating and apply those lessons to real life. My first book will be Northanger Abbey. I am interested in that book because of Catherine’s fantasies. The sociopath lived in a fantasy world as well. It should be interesting to see what else I learn.
Your comments and thoughts are welcome!